Random Saturday Ramblings

March 22, 2008 at 7:32 am | In Funny things, complaints, random |
Tags: , ,

I get up at 7 this morning, not really looking forward to driving out to UIC for placement tests. Algebra? What? Why include numbers AND letters?

I look out the window only to find that the freshly snow-blowed driveway is now covered with MORE snow. I thought yesterday was the end of it. I don’t remember hearing, “When you wake up Saturday morning don’t look out your window because it’ll suck ass.” Thanks for the warning!

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Anyway, on a less angry note, a couple weeks ago my mom an stepdad joined my grandparents and me for dinner. Some how we got on the topic of meatloaf and hamburgers and the variety of ways to make such items. My stepdad is pretty awesome in a weird I-like-to-make-donuts-with-meat-in-them kind of way. So today I share with you a quote from our meatloaf discussion:

Stepdad: “Meatloaf is a waste of my time.”
Mom: “Meatloaf, men, same thing.”

It’s not quite as crazy at the uterus conversation I had with my grandparents, but I felt the need to document this anyway.

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Last night I discovered that there’s a good chance I could have a displaced adam’s apple on the right side of my neck! Oh my gods! Call the medical journals! Jenn needs a new laptop! Okay it’s probably not an adam’s apple, but when I tilt my head to the right, I can feel a ball under my jaw. I asked Jamie if I should Google “ball in throat,” but she suggested I use “lump.” I did.

Could be an infected or swollen gland. If that’s the case, I’d like to know why it’s swollen or what infection I’m fighting so I might assist that little gland. Anything so the damn thing stops hurting. BEFORE someone’s all like “gargle with salt water!” or “Call the doctor!” No and I did. They can’t take me until next week so there’s not much I can do about it right now other than complain. So ha!

But seriously if it turns out to be an adam’s apple, how uncool would that be to find out I’m a man with boobs?

12 Comments »

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  1. Hmm…would life be easier that way or worse? We’ll love you regardless.

    Comment by Ben — March 22, 2008 #

  2. Milk it your adam’s apple for all its worth. Hawaii!

    Comment by Jamie — March 22, 2008 #

  3. Ben -
    Aww thanks!

    Jamie -
    Working on it!!!

    Comment by Jenn — March 22, 2008 #

  4. Check to make sure you aren’t growing a pair doooowwwnnnn there. ;)

    Comment by Curlysue — March 22, 2008 #

  5. Look downstairs, make sure everything is in a feminine order. If not you could be the first ever to have a natural sex change!

    Comment by Annette — March 22, 2008 #

  6. If it DOES turn out to be an Adam’s apple, you need to make up some sweet story about how you ripped it out of the throat of a man when you were wee. And then . . . you accidentally swallowed it? Yeah, forget that. Step one: Ignore my advice. I think you’ll be fine after that.

    Comment by Rachelskirts — March 22, 2008 #

  7. Everything’s okay downstairs folks!

    Comment by freeandflawed — March 22, 2008 #

  8. i snorted. that was funny.

    uncool, perhaps, but still funny.

    Comment by tia — March 22, 2008 #

  9. I am REASONABLY certain that you would have noticed any manly traits before now. :)

    Probably a swollen gland - I get the same thing.

    Comment by Big Time Fancy — March 23, 2008 #

  10. That was funny. I wonder if swallowing all the time will help. But don’t Google that, either.

    Comment by Noelle — March 24, 2008 #

  11. lol! This is a funny post. I have the swollen gland thing before… always best to check it out, but mine has always been nothing. One time I got a swollen armpit gland, lol. Now that was funny.

    Comment by somechick84 — March 24, 2008 #

  12. While it would be pretty uncool to discover you were a guy, imagine the crotch-scratching, facial-hair-experimenting, chest-bumping new horizons to explore! Nah, probably still lame. But the good news is that it’s probably a swollen gland– I get them, too, and have yet to become another gender.

    Comment by Megan — March 24, 2008 #

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